The Audacity of a Winner of the Nobel Peace Prize and Quid Pro Quo

Maam, I read mixed reviews .  People are not happy with the Nobel committee's choice of the peace prize cadidate for this year.  Should we not be happy to choose a man,  who in his own words,  is  not skepticial about  world peace based on the simple idea of what binds us together is geater than what binds us apart.

Well, Sockie this is a free world, or at least most of it is.  People have a right to express an opinion. Then again there are leaders who do not wish for world peace.  Power is used in many places to enslave large swathes of population.

Maam, BBC panel sounds so angry, they think that President Obama has not yet proved himself.  It is premature to bestow this honour upon him.  It is like giving out a prize for the potential rather then the actual events that have yet to happen Might this be because politicians want a quid pro quo motif to peace?.   

Sockie, I personally  think, Mr. Obama has just been handed the greatest role of his life, much bigger then his role as the President of the United States of America. His audacity at winning and acceptance may be seen to mean  that Mr. Obama's politics will continue down  the peace road.  I think the Nobel committe is looking for that promise, but there are others who may be unhappy for the same reason.  

And what might that role be,  Maam?

The role of the planets's peacekeeper,  Sockie. But the odds are stacked against him. History will judge him harshly if he fails . If there are others better qualified to receive this prize I have not heard about them . At this moment I think Mr. Obama is probably one of the most respected leaders in the world,  he is really the leading rock star of politics. Perhaps in electing him the Nobel committee felt/hoped that the message will be heard across the world .

I see what you mean  Maam, in the sense that more people across the world are fimiliar with Hollywood , and  the President's  charismatic personality  as superstar politician could get him an audience across the globe  like say Brad Pitt.

 Not sure if the President will appreciate this analogy.  But close enough.

Maam, this kind of takes the spotlight off the banks for the moment .  How are we doing there?.

Not so good.  Last I heard we are still under review.  Getting a point across to the banks is not unlike the peace process.  It is slow and painful . At first, there is denial, then agression then disclaimers, then we go to war of words, then we negotiate,   and finally.............. well, we don't know the end yet.

Ergo,  we persist  Maam!.

Spot on, Sockie

Love is in the Air and John Maynard Keynes...............

"Maam,  love is in the Air, yo ho ho ho ho ; Love is in the Air yea hey hey hey hey ; Love is in the Air laa , la la la la .. .......".

"Really Sockie, did Sahib order a brunch of roses for me".

"Please Maam,  too early for the twilight zone. Earth to Maam please, reality bytes please" .

"Sockie, You think cupid's arrow does not  strike the  English heart".

"Think Shakespeare, Sockie".
"Think Henry the VIII, Maam".

"Think Byron and Keats, Sockie".
"Think Jack the Ripper, Maam".

"Think Rochester of Jane Eyre"
"Think broody and secretive. We have that at home, Maam".

"Right Sockie,  forget the roses . Best keep my head,  you think . So who is in love then?"

"Well,  Maam, there was this little item in the Gulf News about Mr. Jawaharlal Nehru,  India 's first Prime Minister  and Lady Edwina Mountbatten  wife of  Lord Louis Mountbatten Britain's last Governor General in the post indepedent India .Lord Mountbatten played a very important role in the transfer of power from the British to Indians. Not clear if he had any role in dividing India".

"It is believed/rumoured  that lady Edwina and Mr. Nehru had a  deep liaison of the hearts amidst the  major political storm in  1947 that emanated from India's partition    Interesting,  you should mention roses though, Mr. Nehru was known to wear a red rose in his lapel.  Perhaps a signal to Lady Edwina. This bit of history was revealed by  a daughter of Lady Edwina , and the Congress is now trying to supress the story from becoming public".

"Well, Sockie , like everything else within  the Congress, the story has been public for sometime but no one knew about it until it was made public abroad..  VIP affairs of the heart are generally not discussed in India .Also,  you must understand , what was regarded as an affair in those days may be merely a man and a woman gazing into each others eyes or holding hands. Besides, sex is still taboo in India".

"Really,  Maam with a billion + live evidence to support its existence, how can that be?"

"Well, Sockie our police often loose evidence!"
"But, we talk around it, we talk at it, we talk through it,  even do it but,  we do not talk about it".

"So Maam, is that why Lord Mountbatten took the British out of  India ?  as revenge against Nehru . I believe many Indians,  who had to cross borders and relocate after the British left ,   bemoaned their fate under a free India".

"Worth a dekkho,  Sockie!.  No one has offered this explanation before".

"Maam,  is the recession finally over?, we could go shopping for some new clothes for you and me, and buy some of those expensive dog treats".

Well sockie, there lived this economist Keynes who wrote some  time in the early 19th century

"The moral problem of our day is concerned with the love of money, with the habitual appeal to the money motive in nine-tenth of the activities of life, with the universal striving after individual economic security as the prime objects of endeavour, with the social approbation of money as the measure of constructive success and with the social appeal of hoarding instinct as the foundation of necessary provision for the family and for the future".

"Does that mean we should save and not spend. I mean Maam there is only so much money in the world.  The banks could not have lost more then we put in".

"Au contraire,   Sockie. Mr. Keynes promoted spending.   Hoarding is what causes recession and results in many other social ills. . Economists create revolutions out of the thin  air of want  as opposed to need , with their theories of meltdown and inflation and deflation .You see that happening around us this very moment. Protests everywhere,  from China to America".

"And you are wrong,   the banks did loose more because the balance was on paper only.  The banks played upon people's fears of financial insecurity and offered to make money with money.
The bankers got greedy as the people became obsessed with making more money, more possessions, more houses . They borrowed and borrowed and the banks continued to lend.  And the experts had no clue as to how this scenario would play out in the end. Finally, when  the banks went bust the bankers said they did not see it coming".

"But, Maam it is as clear as the writing on the wall,  that if one keeps borrowing then one clearly does not have the means to pay back" .

"Spot on , Sockie".

 "But, Maam,  why only investors, why didn't the bankers go bust as well".

"Good question,  Sockie, I shall present it at the next meeting with our banker".

And The Honourable Minister Says................

Maam, the press has gone to town on the governments's austerity measures in India.  what's all the fuss anyway?. The ministers wear khadi , except when thay visit the White House or 10 Downing Street.    That's a statement of solidarity with the masses.

Not so Sock.  Khadi is worn by the rich and the famous and the designer brands promote it in their  haute couture collections . Khadi's kind of out of the reach of the common man.

I see Maam.  So Mr. Shashi Tharoor's remarks carry political implications that may cause the economy to melt further.

How so,  Sockie?

Well Maam,  remarks like that from the Honourable Minister could bring down the oil prices further .  India is an emerging market, one expects it will have the larget number of automobile users, after the Chinese of course ,  in the forseeable future . See where I am going with this Maam.

No. Sockie.

Cattle,  Maam.  The new mode of transport . There are so many holy cows on the streets of India .  They can replace cars and they are free .

Oh I see Sockie.  You mean more Indian jobs lost in the oil rich countries?

Well, Maam the banks have already seen to that. But I suppose the NRI's  will have fewer dollars to send back home. I am not an economist, but this can't be good for India.

Spot on , Sockie.

Maam, there's news that concern dogs.  Could make us rich.

What's that,  Sockie?

I know you don't like bad words in the blog, but it was in the papers so maybe I can write it down. It concerns dog poop!  The papers said one can compost it and maybe sell it for cash.

Really, Sockie. Let's  start our own backyard business and beat the recession.
NOT HERE SOCKIE, OUTSIDE THIS VERY MINUTE! 

WHAT DO YOU GET WHEN YOU CROSS A BANKER WITH A LAWYER WITH AN ACADEMICIAN?

Hey Sockie, I sense a chill .

Yessssssss,  Maam, but only towards you.

Why,  so Sock?

Maam, 7 1/2 hours left to guard the Gidwani Snippets, while you went off to attend that meeting with the banker.

Well Sockie, that was kind of in the line of duty, so to speak.

So Maam what happened at this meeting?

 Well, Sockie we all talked , including Sahib. Actually talk is not the word of choice I would call it a debate myself. or the Thesaurus might define it as  the b...........s of all time, or  what do you get when you cross a banker with a lawyer with an academician.

No kidding, Maam.  I thought Sahib only came along as eye candy.  So what did you all say and was the meeting conclusive ?

Well, Sockie what Sahib said had the Sensex moving down  10 points.

So did we pull out this time  Maam ?.

No Sockie the bank did not think it  necessary to inform us. They reckon what's a little more , we may as well lose it all.  But anyway told us that all was well . As for the rest, we agreeed to diagree .

Really Maam, can the bank do that?

Who is to say Sockie, everyman, including the banker , the politician, the congressman, the  delivery man and the baker man says the banks went too far last year. But the banks only said all was well  .

Maam, there is an analogy in history somewhere. Do unto Ceaser ............  Then one day the loyal subjects of Rome got together,  discovered the truth and kind of took Ceaser to task. Maybe the Chinese will  lead the way against the banks, as they do in all else.  Should you not consult the Chinese on this?.   

No Sockie , the Chinese charge too much and the design is usually faulty.

So let me see Maam.  You talked or debated  for 7+ hours and said approximately nothing.  That makes it the most expensive  debate  or B of S,  of all times.

How so Sockie?

That is 50% of Lost Fund Value x 7hours = 7.142%  per hour = 0.199 %per minute . That is 7hrs  X 60 minutes = 420minutes.  Say 50 words per minute =21,000 words  x 7 hours = 147,000 words .

 Maam, if you have a calculator may be we could work  out values in dollars or if you wish in Rupees.

Not the Rupee Sockie, it continues to  devalue .  Last time it was over the Jinnah book, and now it is the Chinese incursions, and by the time we finish converting our losses,  it will be something Shashi Tharoor said.

Maam, could the nice looking Mr. Tharoor  actually ride with the Cattle.  Maybe he ought to discuss it with Sahib first, who knows all about being sent to the doghouse and the cowshed!

Shhhh Sockie too much dirty linen. Was it fun, a day with the Gidwanis? Heard you sort  of disgraced yourself.

Maam the coping mechanism failed from being nervous  .  When I see the Snippets coming towards me it is like a mack truck.  They move as a pair.

Maam I am kind of puzzled. I mean there were three adult human female minders , one of them was a parent, who appeared to be completely controlled by the Snippets. Should it not have been the other way around. And Maam, the Snippets  did pretty much what I do all day long, sleep and eat and then P and Poo and then play and then do it all over again. Maybe you should send the junior Snippet to the next meeting with the bank.  Fewer words, less expense.

And what will he say Sockie?

What he always  says, i want, i want, .......... we could get him to say "I WANT MY MONEY BACK".

Well put Sockie , my sentiment exactly. But,  what would that achieve ?

Maam, I noticed he always gets what he wants from his minders.

Your strategy under consideration,, Sockie.

Growing Old Without Money

Hey Sockie, long time no blog, brain meltdown is it?.

Maam, you have me confused with the bankers. The meltdown as far as I know was in your bank accounts.

Testy ,are we this day?

Ok , the legs not doing so well, giving out at the knees. I tried jumping from your bed this morning, landed on my hiney. Most painful , can I have something for the pain.

First of all Sockie, you are not allowed on my bed, second of all you are not a human. Pain medications for dogs have to be bought at the vet , who almost always charge a fortune.

Did you know that cleaning you teeth at the vet cost 4 times as much as my own . And the cost of one dog toothpaste would fetch about 6 tubes of human toothpaste.

Well, Maam I did not ask for my teeth to be cleaned . I was fine with my breath. Now I know what Sahib has to go through. Anyway, can I have something for my pain.

Ok, Sockie.

Maam how old am I?

In dog terms maybe 13 years, in human terms 91 years.

So Maam can I have some respect around here as I am the eldest member of the the family now.

Yeah, right!

So Maam, what's happening with the world's economy ? What are the experts saying , I mean the fellows who melted it down in the first place. The news is that all banks have been bailed out with the tax money of the people who lost in the meltdown. And now the governments are asking people to spend more , so that the economy would turn around again and may be Maam your stocks and shares would be worth something again.

Yeah, Sockie that is essentially what they are saying. Only problem is, no one has the money to spend, the banks are not lending, people are losing jobs everywhere and those who have jobs are worried how long they will have them. Credit card companies are not forcing people to apply for cards anymore. Matter of fact they are applying force to recover their cards.

What about the experts then? Oh they are fine , see there is a thing called bonus the banks give out. In reality, that is the profit I should have made on my investments which the experts had predicted I would realize. However, there are things called contracts which have to be honoured . Even if the word honour is synonymous with doing right.

So Maam, why don't the governments bail out the people instead. That way we will all have money to spend and the economy would turn around on its head and everybody will be happy again .

That's smart thinking Sockie. Afraid, can't do.

But, why Maam?

Cause the meltdown experts have not thought of this solution yet.

So Maam , I have to grow old without money .

You would actually be growing older Sockie

So Maam, what about this Jinnah fellow?

What about him Sockie.

Weren't you like around when they parted India?.

Quiet Sockie, no need to give out my age. I wasn't of voting age, but I don't believe anyone got to vote. It was a toss up between Nehru and Jinnah. The way I heard it, that is if one can remember that far back, is that Gandhi offered the post of first PM to Jinnah, that sort of got everyone's knickers in a twist and I remember my mother complaining of all the housework she had to do since being bunged out of her comfortable homeland ie Sind etc etc.

Ok, Maam what about my treat now, I have finished the blog.

Sockie the vet said loose weight, be easy on your knees.

Some other time. Giveme me my treat now.

Go to your basket Sockie!

On Banks and Bankers and Poop Jobs in the Wrong Place

Blog # 3
Sock From the Easy Chair

Now I am the official blog writer. Maybe I will get paid in that juicy cucumber, which I am denied these days. Things still sombre around the home front. The word bank and bankers are frequently spoken of , at times, followed by the 'b" word.

So I asked Maam what is this banker?. She says "they are people who run banks" ,

so I ask, what do they run it with? She says "other people's money, which is invested with the bank ".

I ask, is this undertaken gratuitously?, she say "no, there is a fee charged to the investor"

I ask, why did you call them the "b" word. She says, "they lost most of our money".

So I say why didn't you keep the money at home?. She says" can't do it because we will loose it to thieves" . I say, theft is punishable under the law, so the bankers will be punished. She says" baby you have a lot to learn, its not so simple, banks don't get punished they get bailed out because they have not broken any laws",

Now I am puzzled, so who gets punished in this case?. She says "the "investor", which means us".

But, Maam how can you say that, In India people attack and burn government and private property when something like this happens, so she says, "yes babe, only we are NRI's, we sort of let the family dog speak for us.

She is joking of course, may be , I hope. Not that I condone such action, I mean writing emails to Head of Customer Service in India, where is that getting us?.

I mean no disrespect, most humans are nice people. Only, why are governments bailing out the banks and not the people whose money was lost in the first place. I get punished if I do my business wrong and this certainly looks like one big poop job in the wrong place to me .

There was one banker who visited here this morning and Maam was most polite to him. These humans

But, I am really worried and I ask if there is enough money left to buy my chicken dinner tonight. Maam says there is and, she will tell me more about banks later.

Sometime, I wish Maam's brother was around. He would have some juicy insights into this whole situation of banks and bankers. Now, there was a man of caustic wit and an enviable je ne sais quoi. The wit, usually had Maam and him screaming from the roof tops, often at the end of a boozy evening. I would sit at their feet and wonder when we were going home. Sahib, always the diplomat at such events, would get us out of the house before it got to the name calling stage. There were times though when he acted too late . That meant we were not meeting again for about 6 months at least. The brother is gone now, we all miss him. I think Maam needs an evening like that again, to get her out of this gloom.

Gosh, there is another flu virus, they call it the swine flu and I read it has nothing to do with the poor pig. First they eat it and now they blame it. I am worried, during the SARS attack, it was rumored that all domestic pets would be put down. What if the panic strikes again? Humans are not stoic in adversity, they run amok looking for someone to blame. Maam says, coming on top of the financial disasters of the past few months, this will be catastrophic.

What a mess. I hinted in my last blog, that the First Dog may be running the planet . Want proof? . I was watching CNN the other day, and there were all these reporters behind a fence, while the adorable looking First Family frolicked with the First Dog. So where do you think the cameras were aimed at ? at the First Dog, but naturally ! Need more evidence, I think not
Time for a nap. Blogging is hard work .